Look for a Good Feeling

by Sharon Castle - Lifestyle and Wellness Coach

June was a very full and busy time in my coaching practice. Online programs, interviews and workshops, plus many hours of coaching, and one dominant theme has emerged:  most people make Oscar-winning movies in their heads and then get themselves into a whole heap of trouble when they live as if these made-up movies are real!

Now I understand that this statement may seem ludicrous but listen up for a bit if you’re confused about what I mean.

In our innocence we believe that if we are not worrying, stressing and overwhelmed with all the stuff that’s going on in the world and in our lives, we don’t care.  This is a lie and you don’t have to think that.  If you’ve been wearing your ‘deepest concern’ about the state of things as a badge of honour, I am here to tell you that it’s not working.  You know that worrying about things doesn’t fix things and yet like me, you still do that.

Over the years I have managed to master a few things that have helped me to stay more positive and aware but I still get myself into a state about certain things, albeit briefly.

Once I took the time to notice how much noise I was creating in my own head, I became more conscious and caught myself making movie after movie and then living as if the story was true. I was really good at being “a drunk monkey stung by a scorpion.”  Visualize that and then check if you’re behaving in that way.

Like I said, it’s done innocently but without taking some time to recognize that you're the one writing, producing, directing and acting out the negative narrative of your made up movie, you won't be able to re-write a more positive story.

It’s your life and it’s your choice and using the excuse “it’s just the way I am” to justify the negative way in which you are living, just doesn’t help you.

The opening story in Ekhart Tolle’s book “A New Earth” describes his shock at realizing that he was as crazy as the lady he perceived to be crazy who was speaking to herself out loud.  He was negatively 'speaking' inside his mind but the impact is the same. It’s crazy. It makes you stupid (more on the neuroscience of that in another blog post). It doesn’t help. It keeps you stuck. It’s just a bad habit.

Get real about the lies you’re telling yourself about stuff that you have no way of knowing is true!

One of my movies was “if my children/friend/family don’t call me they don’t love me.”  What nonsense because I know they love me and they have full lives, and just like me they get caught up in their day.  Another really epic one was “People won’t like me if they know this or that – wadda wadda wadda….”  Such BS because I’ve found the more real and raw, I am the more people seem to relate to me because I’m being authentically me.

A few weeks ago I completed a three-week on-line live coaching program “Conversations with Sharon” and the results were incredible.  Sharing with the group how I came to understand the Three Principles of Mind, Consciousness and Thought was the catalyst for change for everyone.  Once you become aware that you are NOT your thoughts, it’s a game-changer.

What stories or movies are you making-up in your head?

I am once again reminded of the wonderful quote by Dr Wayne Dyer:

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at, change.”

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Sharon Castle is a Life Coach, and a Lifestyle & Wellness Coach. Her interest and relentless pursuit of knowledge has taken her all over the world both as a student and as an International speaker, Life Coach and Lifestyle and Wellness Coach. She is passionate about people development and growth and encouraging individuals to take ownership and accountability of their lives and their performance in the workplace. Now in her 60s, Sharon is now on a mission to help others find their way to more freedom, balance and happiness. www.sharoncastle.co.za 

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