by Anja van Beek, Talent Strategist, Leadership & HR Expert and Executive Coach
As an entrepreneur, I’m certain that we can all relate to the emotional roller coaster of ups and downs. One day you are so excited that you have started your business. You are on purpose making a meaningful impact in the world and the next day you feel like you made the wrong choice, especially if the target for the month is behind. The following day, you land a big new client and you feel energized and happy that you’re not working for a boss.
Where does confidence fit in? Having a healthy level of self-confidence can help you become more successful in your business and personal life. And to add, there is a difference between confidence and arrogance!
Self-confidence means trusting your own judgement, abilities and competence. For me it simply means understanding that the quality of my thinking = the quality of my success. Self-confidence has a big impact on how others perceive you. Especially as you only have a seven second period to make an impression when meeting someone for the first time. 87% of what our brain absorb is visual, 9% is from what we hear, only 4% is through other senses. The words we use is therefore less important than your body language when meeting prospective clients.
Here are 5 steps that will boost your self confidence
1. Start celebrating other’s successes; stop comparing yourself to them.
One of the biggest lessons in my journey as an entrepreneur was to stop comparing myself with associates or other profiles I see on social media and in my network. Embrace an abundance mindset and know there is sufficient work for all. More importantly, you have a unique offering and don’t damper your sparkle by choosing jealousy over collaboration. The magic will start when you are open to celebrating women’s successes and cheering them on from the side.
2. Nurture risk-taking and willingness to fail instead of seeing failures as a weakness
Failure should be reframed and not seen as a negative trait or weakness. A study done by Sage, found that 26% of women who did not own a business were “not afraid to take a risk” compared to 43% who owned a business. You might argue that it is due to business owners having so much to lose and can’t afford to take too many risks. We need to find the balance. Being risk-averse can dampen your business growth. On the flipside, being too risk-tolerant can also negatively impact your business. Find the balance at an appropriate risk-taking point. Have a growth mindset where you learn when a risk doesn’t work out. Always remember to seek input from mentors before taking a risk and try different strategies when something didn’t work out. Do many small experiments and tweak until it is successful.
3. Practice self-compassion and do positive self-talk (daily!)
We underestimate the power of our words. When setting goals, we teach people to use words like “I commit to…”, or “I promise to…”, instead of “I wish…”. Similarly, we need to be mindful of how you speak about yourself. The neuroscientist says, “What the brain thinks, the body believes”. So, the next time you say “that was stupid of me” reframe the words to something different.
4. Surround yourself with successful people.
According to research by social psychologist Dr. David McClelland of Harvard, [the people you habitually associate with] determine as much as 95% of your success or failure in life. What an insight! This can have important consequences when you consider who you spend most of your time with. Do you spend time with people that you admire, that is aligned to your values and walk the talk when it comes to building a business or leading by example? Or do you interact with people that complain most of the time, whose work ethic behaviour is questionable or people not taking pride in their work? Consider if you need to reassess their role in your life.
5. Increase your D.O.S.E of feel-good chemicals through exercise & movement
This is not new. We all know the impact of exercising on our bodies and brains. Do you have habits in place to increase your natural daily D.O.S.E or do you need to create new daily habits?
Final thoughts
I love Amy Cuddy’s Ted talk. She elaborates why your body language can shape you and suggest a power pose you can use. I challenge you to do the power pose every morning and see if you experience a difference in your confidence levels.
Anja van Beek is a Talent Strategist, Leadership Expert and Coach. This ex-Sage HR Director founded her own consulting and coaching business in 2017. She now partners and consults with leaders and HR teams on all people-related aspects with a specific focus on adopting an agile mindset integrating agile principles and practices. Anja is a leadership coach and an expert in supporting teams to remain relevant and thrive in the future of work. She is a facilitator focusing on leadership development, mentoring and change management. In her career she establishes the HR department and was HR director when the company won the acclaimed Deloitte Best Company to Work For, three times. Anja is a regular thought leader on prominent HR and business news outlets; guest speaker on 702 & Cape Talk’s World of Work feature. She is an International speaker and a confirmed speaker at ATD 2020, world’s largest, most comprehensive event for talent development and learning professionals, talking about the Future of Work and Agile Leadership. Anja has a BComm (Hons) degree in Industrial Relations, she has an international ICF accredited coaching qualification and is a Neurozone Practitioner. In 2018 Anja became one of the first worldwide to be authorised as an Agile Talent professional and authorised instructor.
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