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How to Manage Team Members Older Than You

May 7, 2022 Melanie Hawken

by Anja van Beek 

 We currently work in businesses where we find five generations in the workplace. This means if you’re a manager in your 30’s you’re most probably managing team members that are 10 or 20 years older than you. In my career as an HR leader for a multinational business, we have appointed many younger managers based on their leadership potential - not their technical skills - which resulted in them managing older team members. How do you feel about reporting to someone younger than yourself? 


A survey conducted by OfficeTeam, found that 82% of people said they would be comfortable working for a younger manager. Yet, they highlight that dissimilar work ethics and values are some of the biggest challenges with having a younger manager. A popular perception of the younger generation is that they seem to be open to moving to another (more interesting role) easily and are eager to get as much exposure as soon as possible. This perceived lack of patience is an important aspect to address when managing older team members. Be clear on your commitment to the team. If your team know you are in it for the long haul, it can be a good starting point for building a relationship of trust.

Here are five tips to navigate your way in these types of relationships at work:

  • Lead with humility. You might be tempted to validate why you have been appointed in the role. Don’t. Rather, be authentic and let your leadership style speak for itself. Avoid saying things like “I know I have only been here for two years…”.

  • Bear in mind that team members that have been in the business longer, might be very sensitive towards any behaviour coming from a place of “power”. Discuss how you can support them in their roles.

  • Be easy on (immediate) change. People often say, “don’t rock the boat, if it is working, don’t change it”. As a new manager, I’m certain that you are eager to innovate and try new things as you want to make an impact.

  • Be mindful of how you approach and suggest changes. A practical way is to have a conversation with the team about the one thing they don’t want to see changed AND the one thing that needs to be changed. Use a coaching approach, where you ask questions instead of directing. Be a sounding board and remove the obstacles standing in their way of success.

  • Focus on building relationships. This seems like an obvious step. But are you intentional about building a relationship of trust? Trust is built on three pillars: competence, character and care. It is the character and care pillar that is relevant when building relationships.

Human beings crave connection and want to feel they belong to a team. They also want to make a meaningful contribution. An authentic working relationship is about knowing your team better. Are you keen to understand what are the intrinsic motivation for each member? Do you know anything about them outside work? Hobbies? Their partners or kids names? Remain curious to learn. As the manager, you don’t need to have all the answers yourself. The team’s constitutional wisdom can support you in your new responsibilities. Tap into their expertise. Remain curious to understand why things have been done in a specific way. 

Liz Wiseman, an author of Multipliers, says “We often find that people who are inexperienced outperform people with experience, not because of the new ideas that they bring, but [because of] the hunger and openness that they bring.” Practice active listening and mobilize the knowledge of your team.

Ask for feedback but don’t seek approval. Research has highlighted the power of a diverse team; the collective intelligence always trumps the intelligence of the individual. Involve your team and brainstorm as a group. Ask for feedback. What is working, what needs tweaking and what should be dropped is a good conversation to have with team members

In closing

We are human and you will possibly make mistakes. Remember: you don’t need to learn everything overnight. Remain real and focus on your vision for the team. Lead with purpose, foster open communication and build a space where people feel respected and valued. If you do that, you are halfway there.  


Anja van Beek is a Talent Strategist, Leadership Expert and Coach. This ex-Sage HR Director founded her own consulting and coaching business in 2017. She now partners and consults with leaders and HR teams on all people-related aspects with a specific focus on adopting an agile mindset integrating agile principles and practices. Anja is a leadership coach and an expert in supporting teams to remain relevant and thrive in the future of work. She is a facilitator focusing on leadership development, mentoring and change management. In her career she establishes the HR department and was HR director when the company won the acclaimed Deloitte Best Company to Work For, three times. Anja is a regular thought leader on prominent HR and business news outlets; guest speaker on 702 & Cape Talk’s World of Work feature. She is an International speaker and a confirmed speaker at ATD 2020, world’s largest, most comprehensive event for talent development and learning professionals, talking about the Future of Work and Agile Leadership. Anja has a BComm (Hons) degree in Industrial Relations, she has an international ICF accredited coaching qualification and is a Neurozone Practitioner. In 2018 Anja became one of the first worldwide to be authorised as an Agile Talent professional and authorised instructor.

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