It happens often: we appear to be listening but in fact we are so distracted by other thoughts, other people, and other things we have to do, that we’re not really actively listening. Or we’re thinking about what we’re going to say next and how we can say it so that we sound fabulously articulate and intelligent. We don’t entirely hear what the person in front of us is saying. We’re not getting the whole message. In our careers, it’s critical that we are heard. But it’s just as critical that we hear, that we truly hear. Our ability to really listen to others is as vital to our overall presence.

Our to-do list has started to become a guilt list constantly getting longer and a reminder of what we have not achieved. The problem with the to-do list is it has become a collection tool but does not provide any clarity in terms of order of importance of tasks and what truly needs our focus to achieve our goals. 

One of my favourite authors is Derek Sivers, he started the company CD Baby as a passion project which was later sold to iTunes for over 20 million dollars! He released a book called ‘Anything you want: 40 lessons for a new kind of entrepreneur’. I have shared the most useful excerpt which has made me think differently about how I run my company, Beyond the Dress, enjoy!

Our people skills come down to how well we interact with the people around us, and the strength of the relationships that we build. We already know that performance alone doesn’t count for everything. Of course, our ability to do our jobs well is critical to our career success, but often it’s our overall image that plays a bigger role in determining how successful we will be. And central to that image is how we handle our interpersonal relationships.

Your attitude is the way you view the world. What attitude did you choose to bring with you today? We all have a choice. We can choose an inner dialogue of self-encouragement and self-motivation, or we can choose one of self-defeat and self-pity. It’s a power each of us has. We all go through times of hardship; it can’t always be smooth sailing. The key is to realise it’s not what happens to you that matters; but as we’re sure you’ve heard before, it’s how you choose to respond.

When things don’t go your way, “looking on the bright side” is a real test of your ability to show gratitude. No one is perfect at showing gratitude at first, but here’s an idea that can help that I learned from Tim Ferriss, author of Tools of Titan and The Four Hour Work Week.

If you’re chronically late, how do you start showing up on time? Many people have the habit of constantly running late — and they drive themselves, and other people, crazy. Now, I have the opposite problem — I’m pathologically early, and often arrive places too soon. This allows me to arrive relaxed, calm and confident; I also always sure I keep reading material on me like my Kindle so I can feel productive while waiting. I make sure I don’t make it someone else’s problem that I arrive early and wait for the scheduled time before calling them.