by Edna Reis
We constantly trap ourselves in the past or future and forget to live in the present. But the thing is: we have to learn to let go, we need to release the things we no longer need, things that have hurt us, things we will no longer experience. We all know this; we all have read books or came across a quote about it. Psychology has been showing us the facts on the dangers of being stuck in the past and the future.
Of course, being a psychologist myself, I can’t simply tell you to shake everything off and move on. One must be aware that if your thoughts are interfering with your daily life, it’s possible that whatever has happened in the past and left such a devastating impact in your life, may have left you with trauma, and that trauma has led to a mental health condition such as PTSD, anxiety, or depression. Therefore, the best thing to do is to seek help from a mental health professional.
But here, I am talking about things we can out of our goodwill and after self-work, make an effort to do on our own.
Try writing therapy
Take a moment and think of all of the bad experiences, fears, repetitive thoughts that you are continuously choosing, things that are limiting you and that are stopping you from truly experiencing new things. Write them down. Everything. Try to make a body scan, a mind scan, a life scan. Let your therapy begin there, with a pen, a paper and yourself. Do it at least once a day, and you will start seeing good results out of this practice. Regular therapeutic writing can help you find meaning in your experiences, view things from a new perspective, and see the silver linings in your most stressful or negative experiences. It can also lead to important insights about yourself and your environment that may be difficult to determine without focused writing.
Try mindfulness
This ancient practice that can be done from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed is both powerful and therapeutic. You don’t need to become a monk, leave everything behind to go to the woods. Mindfulness is about bringing your mind to wherever your body is and to experience that moment with compassion and openness. It is a powerful tool against the urge of being in the future. It helps you to have undivided attention to the moment you are in and cherish every breath you take as well as every lesson life so kindly presents us every minute of our day. You can practice it by taking a few deep breaths after waking up; by paying attention to how your body feels while in the shower as the water touches your body; by savouring each sip of your tea or coffee, and by being fully present while completing your work tasks.
As great as the benefits of those two practices sound, it can be difficult to get started. After all, it can be a challenge to start even the most basic of good habits! But with effort, willingness to overcome our difficulties and a great dose of self-compassion, once you take the first step and make a commitment to do it every day, you will succeed.
Edna Reis is a Psychologist and the Founder & Chief Wellbeing Officer of Active Wellness, a company whose aim is to help organizations to have a workforce with good mental health. As a psychologist, I consider it crucial to talk and make efforts to take care of our mental health, because this is a comprehensive part of the general well-being of the individual and society in general. The stability of the psyche of each and every person enables the stability of society as a whole.
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