PAULA QUINSEE, Relationship Expert & Author of Embracing Conflict. Articles →
Relationship Expert & Author of Embracing Conflict
Paula Quinsee is a South African Entrepreneur, Coach, Speaker, Mentor, and Author. She is a certified Imago Educator and Professional Facilitator and NLP Life Coach. As a Life Coach, Paula helps people discover the direction that they want to head down in their lives and help them design strategic goals that’ll ensure that they get there effortlessly. Paula holds a BBA Marketing Degree with over 15 years experience in the Marketing and Advertising field in a corporate environment having worked at companies such as Standard Bank, Nedbank and KFC. She is author of a self-help guide 'Embracing Conflict' which is filled with practical tools and insights for personal growth.
I heard so many people saying this phrase during these past few weeks. I remember when I first noticed the decorations going up in Pick 'n Pay and thought to myself, "No, not yet. I'm not ready for December to come around, there's still so much I have to get done!"
Spring season has always been associated with decluttering, clearing out, spring cleaning and making space for the new. This gives us wonderful opportunities to take stock of what we have, what's working, what's not working, what is valuable and what has passed it's 'sell by' date. It's not that different when it comes to our relationships.
Often we hire for skill yet fire for behavior. This is because we tend to measure skills on qualifications, years of experience, achievements and organisations worked at. Just because one person thrived in a role does not mean they will thrive in a new role as the environment and team dynamics will contribute to the way someone behaves. It’s far easier to teach someone skills than it is to try and teach them the behavior you need.
Difficult conversations are an inevitable part of the workplace, however many of us have had bad experiences with these kind of conversations in the past. The key is to learn how to handle them in a way that produces a positive outcome for all involved.
Values are our moral compass, they guide us each day in our thoughts, actions, behavior and decision making. We use our values in every area of our life such as our goals, relationships, decisions, the workplace, leadership and more. They serve as the tick boxes against which we mentally reference ourselves as to making the right decisions and choices based on the situation we are facing at that time.
Having good relationships at work is not just good for workers, it’s good for companies. The well-established American consulting company, Gallup says that people are seven times more likely to be engaged in their jobs if they have a friend at work. And engaged workers are productive workers.
There are times when we need have to have a serious conversation with someone whether it is our partner, a friend or a work colleague. It’s one of those conversations where we need to be open and honest, not only with ourselves but also with the person in front of us. It could be about an incident, something they have said or done (or not done), non performance or non delivery.
December can either have a positive (or negative) impact on relationships but what can you do if the holiday season hasn’t gone so well on that front? Relationships are a constant challenge. No matter who you are, or who your partner is, for relationships to work, both parties need to put in some good effort to keep them going, and to keep both partners engaged, interested, and happy.
Many organizations forget that their employees are human beings and have lives of their own, because they are so focused on chasing the numbers and the targets. But, if your employees are not happy, don’t enjoy coming to work, and feel like their contribution is not being valued they will eventually stop giving their best and start looking for other options.
How many times have you said yes or committed to something and later regretted it? And then find yourself looking for every excuse in the book to get out of said commitment. If this resonates with you, then read on…
I hear many people and companies say that soft skills training is a warm and fuzzy exercise. I believe in most cases this is a lack of knowledge or egos getting in the way of acknowledging the key role and benefits that these skills play in both individual and organizational growth.
As the New Year kicks in, it's important to take time to reflect on the past year and all it has held. This includes both the highs and the lows, and an assessment of how far we have come (so we know how much further still to go). The reason why this is important is so that we can plan better for 2017. As they say "if you fail to plan, you plan to fail.” By reflecting on both the highs and lows, we can gain valuable insights and feedback for ourselves to help guide us going forward. Here's why....