by Laura Camacho, PhD
If you stay in business long enough, you eventually develop the level of mental and emotional fortitude you need to succeed.
This invisible strength empowers you to take on all those challenges that seem to pop up out of nowhere. A fierce emotional backbone causes you to look problems squarely in the eye, and not only not be defeated, but become even better through the process of solving them.
Emotions have a lot to do with how well (and how quickly) we respond to setbacks. While emotions are part of being human, we need to proactively manage them, rather than be managed by them. Here’s a tool I use and recommend.
I call it “choosing your emotions.”
Emotions come and go and a lot of times are the result of our interpretation of the event, not the event itself. (By “event” I mean problem, challenge, annoyance….whatever is keeping you from moving forward at the moment.) That observation leads you to know that emotional states are manageable, not inevitable patterns carved in granite.
Secondly, when planning your day consider what emotional state would serve your best to get everything done. Does the day call for you to be calm? Assertive? Cheerful? Bold? Fierce?
This isn’t a question that you answer correctly or incorrectly. It’s a question to get you proactively deciding on your preferred useful emotional states.
So pick one. Let’s say you decide a state of cheerfulness is the best way to go about your day.
What can you do to feel more cheerful? How cheerful can you possibly feel (without annoying yourself!)
Maybe there’s a dress or shade of lipstick that puts a smile on your face and swagger in your step.
Perhaps that song you love from 10 years ago makes you feel merry.
Is there someone you can talk to who is always positive?
Don’t worry if you feel cranky and only manage to make yourself a trifle less cranky. That is actually progress!
Make choosing your emotions a part of your daily routine, just like selecting your clothes for the day. You may find the people around you start following your example and choose more helpful emotions as well!
Laura Camacho, MBA, PhD, PMP, is an executive coach, trainer and speaker who opened Mixonian Institute in 2009 to rid the world of boring business communication. She has created innovative training programs for local and international companies, related to leadership effectiveness, excellent feedback, growth mindset and emotional intelligence. Multilingual, Dr. Camacho’s career highlights include facilitating The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (in Spanish,) being editor of the leading management newsletter in Venezuela. For 10 years she taught communication classes at ECU and College of Charleston. www.mixonian.com
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